Delicious Autumn!

Personification of Autumn

Autumn Leaves

Folks "Listen! the wind is rising, and the air is wild with leaves,
We have had our summer evenings, now for October eves!"
- Humber Wolves

True that the bright summer days are now over, green leaves will all soon be gone, fresh landscapes are turning golden and you feel the bone structure of landscapes ( I call it the "stick season")- Now the frost is in the air, there is color everywhere - the superb color effects from August - November. I guess that's the charm of the season, needless to say every season has its charm. The acoustics of this season are different and all sounds are as crisp as autumn air, a mellower season overall. A feeling of unexpected sharpness - a swift elation. It is that time of the year where we see ripeness, color and time of maturity. Looks like the season of Autumn is more reasonable and serious, it glows moderately, and not frivolously. Reminds me of a quotation of Glen Wolff and Jerry Dennis which goes like this "Autumn begins with a subtle change in the light, with skies a deeper blue, and nights that become suddenly clear and chilled. The season comes full with the first frost, the disappearance of migrant birds, and the harvesting of the season's last crops". Wow! wonder how nature is all profligate! and autumn is at its best of cheer.

The word "autumn" comes from the Old French word "autompne" which became common in the 16th century. In popular culture autumn's association is with the transition from warm to cold weather, and its related status as the season of the primary harvest. The predominant mood of these autumnal celebrations is a gladness for the fruits of the earth mixed with a certain melancholy linked to the imminent arrival of the harsh weather.

So "..for those whose favorite season is autumn with its days of cloudless sky, of spacious and clear, far-flung panoramas --- those who view nature with detachment, for whom nature's appeal is primarily pictorial, classicists as opposed to romanticist, perhaps. On such a day, one is usually excited, physically exhilarated, mentally stimulated. Only not much is left for the imagination." Charlton Ogburn Jr.

Goodness of fathers

I know "Father's Day" is long gone but at this moment I'm strongly thinking about my dad and his virtues. Its a feeling of unveiling a new dimension to your relationship with your father. I just owe almost everything to my dad. And you realize this even more when you grow up, leave him to start an entirely new chapter in your life - its only then that you can measure the greatness and fully appreciate it. "Pride reinforces love". Someone who was always striving to make me a little woman. Line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to me. My dad or should I say all Father's: a role model who gives the gifts of guidance and wisdom while learning how to stretch his ability to love beyond what he knew was possible. A relationship which is like a brief nuggets of gold describing the tremendous influence of a father upon his children. Particularly they convey the importance of a loving spirit and how mutually beneficial a father-child relationship is. Through the years we must be wiling to learn much more from our children, to grow with them, and give them the unconditional love and support needed to foster their trust and courage and sense of personal responsibility.

"Dad you made a huge difference in my life and in profound ways and you've build an unconditional and unbreakable connection which cannot be unmade" is what I convey to my dad. I think fatherly influence reaches many parts of a child's life. They show ways to navigate the world outside the family, are role models of independence and competency, and are a moral anchor. Its a unique and powerful contribution.

On that note I would conclude with this one liner "Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever" Author Unknown

Happy Friday!

Happy Friday Folks!

Hope you enjoy the picture.

Dream On

This often happens to me and to everybody else of course...a series of mental images and emotions occurring during sleep...a state of mind characterized by abstraction and release from reality.....something wonderful!....Yes I'm talking about "Dreams".....though the content and purpose of dreams is not fully understood....however they can link to actual sensations, and for some it can be concluded as the "real world" could be or is an illusion...but the recall of dreams is extremely unreliable. Dreams are so compelling, and they often seem so weird and strange- surely they must have a "purpose" in the maintenance of our psychological health.

We are all thinking creatures and thinking is a valuable adaptation but this doesn't mean that dreams have no meaning or that they make no sense. To the contrary dreams correlate with age, gender and personal preoccupations. Furthermore, they are very "revealing" of what is in our minds. And yes dreams have their "Uses". In more technical terms, dreams have an "emergent" function that develops through culture. Dreams let you process "unfinished business" from your daily life, as well as providing recreation and a creative outlet. No effort is required here, but you only get the minimum benefit. It's like appreciating the beauty of the ocean without realizing its immense depth or the boggling variety of ecosystems it supports, or, its formative role in earth, all of which are just waiting to be explored.

Regardless of what I say "the best thing about dreams is that fleeting moment, when you are between asleep and awake, when you don't know the difference between reality and fantasy, when for just that one moment you feel with your entire soul that the dream is a reality, and it really happened"

On that note "Happy Long Weekend" Folks!

Addiction to Possessiveness!

Relationships of all kinds are like sand held in your hands. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold on to some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost. This always made me pause and reflect. In our attempts to discover and reinvent life, many have been tugged by this emotion of possessiveness sometime. And to add to it there are certain lessons and learnings in life, that demand conscious effort from our side to put them to practice. Difficult to internalize, but awareness always helps in defining our perspective.

Possessiveness either chokes or a more serious outcome would be branching out into other disturbing elements like embroilment thereby contributing in compounding the existing pressures. It is a pretty hard task to be pliable with possessiveness for a long time as it may give in for eruption of the bottled up grievances at an unguarded moment. When life presents many challenges the desire to control can seem natural. There is the illusion that if we control events, ourselves and others we will be successful and secure. Unfortunately the opposite is true. The tighter we grip, hold on, the more out of control we become. Especially in relationships where people feel vulnerable, emotions are high and a great deal is at stake, the wish to control arises. Possessiveness often intensifies.

Therefore according to Osho "Why be possessive? The possessiveness shows simply one thing - that you cannot trust existence. You have to arrange separate security for yourself, safety for yourself"

Summertime Sayings!

Ah summer, what power you have...ever since the weather started getting better I decided that this summer I'm going to make the most of it...be it gardening which is a matter of faith, grounded, on experience that it would bring the right result... taking the kids out to play, swimming or any activities for that matter...have been hardly at home...making the most of it( I mean summertime).....and I'm glad the kids are enjoying it too...just about 5 more weeks left before I head to work....looks like I took a complete 180 degrees turn...therefore June-time of perfect young summer....fulfillment of the promise of earlier months...and that its fresh young beauty will ever fade...air filled with dreamy magical light..landscape lay as if new created in the freshness of childhood...the memories and associations that our flowers gives us are independent of seasons or age though....yet no price is set on the lavish summer...beautiful sunny morning, makes you happy to be alive, doesn't it? I can confidently say that "summer has set in with its usual severity"

Reminds me of William Carlos Williams quote "It is summer, its the solstice, the crowd is cheering, the crowd is laughing in detail permanently, seriously without a thought"....Summer has always been considered to be the most romantic of the four seasons. The clear skies, blazing sun, the gentle summer breeze and the lazy afternoons flavor the season with passion and warm love...

Having said all of the above "Summer, fall, winter, spring, the seasons rotate as each brings its special beauty to this earth of ours. Winter's sow and summer's flowers frozen rivers will flow come spring. There is a renewal of everything" as quoted by Edna Frohock.

Under the weather!

Patrick Young was right when he said that "The trouble with weather forecasting is that its right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it" ....Agreed weather is a great metaphor for life-sometimes good, sometimes bad and there is nothing we can do about it....but can the weather affect our mood...this has always been an intriguing subject...like when the days are bright and sunny, one feels happy and energetic, and when it is cold you feel sad, melancholy or even depressed...probably most people feel a little more blue in the winter and better in the spring but you can't quite put your finger on it. The question rises if there's any evidence to substantiate these seemingly bizarre occurances? Phenomenon? .....Guess changing season is a happier state of mind...one of the secrets of Nature lies in its mood of mockery...fine weather lays heavier weight on mind and hearts of the depressed....but no doubt that there is a muscular energy in sunlight and being outside in pleasant weather really offers a way to re-set your mind set, keeping moods upbeat and cheerful and that's what I'm waiting for....it is the sun that affects the aura.... not that we haven't got much of it this time but at the same time hasn't come full fledged either....its been a roller coaster for a while now ...warm and cold, warm and cold, so this also makes it difficult to keep everyone well...May be this unknown author is right when he/ she quoted "Bad weather always looks worse through a window".....

Researchers found out that taking a trip to someplace warm in the middle of winter or lingering outside when spring arrives can be especially beneficial with pleasant weather improving mood, memory and broadening cognitive style as time spent outside increased. At the same time it should not be surprising that weather and seasons affect human behavior, given that humans evolved with seasonal and weather changes since the dawn of the species. Guess we should all take a lesson from weather-it pays no attention to criticism.

A straightforward prescription "If you wish to reap the psychological benefits of weather specially spring and summer, go outside"

My Idea Of Music!

I know its been a while, no wasn't taking time off but like I said before the month of May has been full of tests and trials for me...

After a day's hectic work I finally managed to see the American Idol ( Grand Finale!)....hearing Bryan Adam's "Somebody" and George Michael's "Freedom" made my day....my whole day's tiredness vanished in seconds hearing these songs....not only I felt more relaxed and at peace, but this entrained state increased my ability to perform well otherwise, the effect is probably because is strikes us more the more familiar we are with it ... Whether you admit it or not, music imbeds our daily life, weaving its beauty and emotion through our thoughts, activities and memories. At least it always gets on one's nerves, soothes the mind and gives it rest as if its taking us out of the actual and whispers to us dim secrets.....its a kind of pleasure which we cannot do without...an universal language....Like Red Auerbach quoted " Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life"....

I have my own particular sorrows, loves, delights; and you have yours...music is the only means whereby we feel these emotions in their universality. Ripples at great speed across languages, ideologies, frontiers and races. Music is the wine which inspires one to new generative processes, induces in us a sense of the infinite and contemplation of the invisible....To conclude I would have to agree with Billy Joel's quotes " I think music in itself is healing. Its an explosive expression of humanity. Its something we are all touched by. No matter what culture we're from, everyone loves music."

Emotional Mindfulness

We all go through different kinds of emotions in a day...obviously the degree to which each one of us go through varies.....and again they are not subject to reason but may be immediately subject to action...probably these emotions that we go through everyday gathers and lifts us up and this is perhaps the highest morality we can instill...at the same time some emotions don't make a lot of noise, its hard to hear pride ...saying this reminds me of what my sister told me couple of days back....this is how it goes..."Read your blog to mom ( about Mother's Day) and she started crying"...I knew that when I was writing the blog about my mom I was emotional and in tears but when heard my feeling at that time was a deeper truth, lead me astray!

And having said that and coming to think of it, I question to myself "What are emotions"? Emotions are energy that we feel in our bodies as physical sensations. Each of us feels our emotions differently, and each of us learned to put names to the various physical sensations that are caused by the energy of our emotional state. In modern times the subject of emotion has become part of the subject matter of several scientific disciplines-biology, sociology, anthropology etc. An interesting phenomena is that when we put ourselves mentally into a person or situation, we experience the emotions of that person more strongly....Purpose of emotions: they certainly have significant effect on us...but what is it all for? .....may be connect good emotions and eliminate the bad ones, signals telling you something about what is happening in the inner you....emotions will not go away, but we can learn to manage them. We all have emotions, and we must deal with them, but we cannot trust them! Why? because emotions are our greatest enemy. More than anything, Satan uses our emotions against us to keep is from walking in the spirit. We know the mind is the battlefield-the place where the battle is waged between the spirit and the soul. I have read that when emotion pulsates, the mind becomes deceived, and conscience is denied its standard of judgment. Emotions urge us towards haste.

Therefore "To me, there are three things we all should do everyday. We should do this everyday of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh everyday. Number two is think. You should spend sometime in thought. And number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special" as quoted by Jim Valvano!

Examed month

Anxiety, excitement, curiosity, hope...all these and many more was wandering about inside my head, eyes wide open and brain machinery whizzing...though attempted to pretend that I knew everything but decided to stay silent.....this is what happened to me when for the first time I traveled in a GO Bus heading to Toronto Union Station.....left home almost 2 hours before, thinking that this is the first time...should always have some time in hand....the ride was quite good...everybody focused on their own thoughts....some looked like their mind might have taken a higher plane of knowledge...so well-versed...seemed to me like they drank from the fountain of knowledge....while this was my observation, I thought to myself "I don't know anything about luck. I've never banked on it, and I'm afraid of people who do. Luck to me is something else; hard work and realizing what is opportunity and what isn't it" as quoted by Lucille Ball....not very sure if that mystery meeting would ignite the circuits of my highest potential....my trembling hand slowly reached the yellow line...the realization came that, deep down, "that it wasn't too bad as I expected to be"......felt the liberating energy from end to end...a place of allowance, unshackled by the tyrannies of ideology....

I considered walking towards the address as I roughly had an idea as to where it would be. My glance swung to a digital clock display...gosh I'm 1 hour 45 minutes early....I considered then taking a stroll on the same street being a beautiful sunny day...therefore kept walking gazing at people, seemed like a rat race at every stop light....cars rushing fast, people gathered in bunches at stop lights waiting for that "walking man sign".....lovely tulip flowers in sets blooming on both sides of the road....looking at my cell phone again I realized it was about time for me to go back to the office where my test is ( for a job opportunity).....completely unprepared, simply going with the attitude "let's give it a shot"....after waiting for good 15 minutes a voice filtered through " Thank you for being prompt, please follow me to the exam hall"...Silence was easily managed....the test began after 15 minutes or so and knowing the first section needs to be completed in 25 minutes made my heart beat fast and my hands were sweating and trembling...but gradually I was okay knowing that I finished it and that most of my answers were correct and finished it before 25 minutes gave me a sigh of relief......overall the test wasn't too bad...tried my best and the rest I leave it to Almighty God!

This whole month of May looks like will either open a new chapter for me or it won't... but at the same time "an unexamed life is not worth living".....

Happy Mother's Day!

Its Mother's Day...so let us all celebrate motherhood and the positive contributions of mothers to society. It is a result of a campaign by Anne Marie Jarvis who, following the death of her mother on May 9, 1905, devoted her life to establishing Mother's Day as a national, and later an international holiday.

I'm miles away from my mom now and I know she's traveling to a different city today ( back home) but through this blog Ma ( as I call her) I want to let you know that I Love you and miss you lots....specially when you came to visit me last year and after staying with me for 4 months and when you were gone there was vacuum all over, as if a part of me is gone...I couldn't go to the basement for one whole week..the moment I would go there "tears" would roll down my eyes....your presence was felt everywhere....tried everything to compensate and console but nothing conquered....emptiness killed me! You have such a humanizing effect....

I know you took immense care of me when I was born and being a below weight baby required utmost care...she wrapped me in cotton for one whole year and nobody was allowed to touch me except ma and dad due to the possibility that I may not grow...your arms are more comforting than anyone else's...the tie is so pure and immaculate...the relationship is so paradoxical..Patience is something that I should learn from you, still remember those days when I used to play hide n seek and you used to feed me simultaneously....and your heart is such a deep abyss where I can always find forgiveness...an archetypal selfless mother sheltering us from consequences of our actions....your love has endured through all....strong, guiding and unselfish...."a pivot on which the whole family spins"...You are a wonderful, rare woman, strong and steadfast and there's no substitute for you! True "A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts." Washington Irving.

Love you Ma and hope you can feel my written word!

While this was for my mom......below is what my daughter wrote for me:-

A Cup of Tea for Mommy And Me!

Here is a little teacup With some words to say ( Pretty, Care, Helpful, Love, Nice)
My tea will refresh you On your special day
Love,
Risha
This is what I have to say to my two little angels:-

"Before you were conceived I wanted you
Before you were born I loved you
Before you were here an hour I would die for you
This is the miracle of life."

The delight of this experience of being a mother and motherhood has been one of the most important parts of my life as a woman. I see a magical closed circle, the miraculous sense of two people.

"If it's surprising, it's useful"

Risha getting ready for school, little one crying because she wants to sleep, preparing breakfast...this is how my first half of the day is in a nutshell. Glad! that the first half of the day is over for today. I'm sitting in front of the computer checking my emails....suddenly see an email from HR personnel ( this organization that I applied for not too long ago for a specific position) for a written test that I have to appear for....this has taken me by surprise....agreeably and astonish slightly, shocked completely! You should have seen my face.....Risha kept saying "mom you are so lucky, you get to go the next grade".....I couldn't stop looking at her and the email....the very essence is surprise and amazement....that's it....how pointless I was thinking I may not be considered....to have it all come out right was a perpetual surprise ...this is what happens.. "when we encounter a natural style we are always surprised and delighted".....the whole thing is miraculous.

Quite true! Surprise is what happens when you’re looking the other way. It can be wonderful and it can be devastating. So pin your ears back and get ready for the things for which you can never fully prepare. And when surprise happens, notice it and ask why, because your subconscious may just given you a clue to some new thing.

Like Tom Hirshfield said "If it's surprising, it's useful"

Little Woman-sugar & spice!

Days passed by so swiftly since the time Risha had her surgery yet she remembers every moment spent at Sick Kids. No wonder young children before they are aware of their own self-importance, learn so easily. Her evasion is quicker than an adult, simply muddles me.

Yesterday with her intellectual expression, beautiful eyes and poise she expresses me her experience almost like a sunset "Mom you know when they took me to the Recovery Room, there was lots of kids to see me and noise but I didn't have that mask on ( strawberry flavored as she requested)".....really I said...."yeah, but then I wanted to sleep" and then what happened I asked..."and then daddy comes and says Hi baby and I fell off to sleep again".....And I thought to myself what a wonderful little woman she is. Oh yeah....her words circled comfortably in her mouth like bubble gum, swished around sweetly soft and satisfying.....Isn't it like taking a bite of something lovely? If only we could eat words. It is this incredibly benevolent little lady that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid. She took great delight in telling me that the girl who picked her up and switched her to her room did hurt her a little bit....describing like a self fulfilling prophecy.....my imagination reeled, mere moments passed I came to realize that sitting in here every minute with her I enjoyed and savored...and her spirit, I can never catch it running after it....

She came close and kissed me soft, hugging me tight like a kitten huddling in the shelter of your clasp, I saw now moon's glow, and then she spoke "Look now I can use my left hand completely...I can move my hand at the back of my head, touch the tip of my nose, hang in the monkey bar, blah, blah, blah"....

With Risha's image before me and seeing her happy, my inner soul whispers in my ears that "she's an adornment of life"!

A Walk with Nature!

What is nature? Is it the mountains and trees and brooks in the wild? Is it us the people, our dreams and aspirations? Is it just a concept that was put into motion by some divine entity? I do not know. Most people have trouble defining nature, but as they say, "I know it when I see it." I guess the silence is very real, almost like an unlimited broadcasting station, if only we tune in. True "One touch of nature makes the whole world kin" as quoted by William Shakespeare. Nature unfolds treasures to one's search, unseals our eyes, illumes our mind...puts our senses in order! True beauty lies in her amplitude. "How strange that nature does not knock, and yet does not intrude"....Yet discovering this idyllic place would mean keeping our sense of proportions regular.

But in the true sense of the term "Nature" ( from the Latin word "natura") refers to the phenomena of the physical universe and life. The concept of nature as a whole, the physical universe is one of several expansions of the original notion. Nature constantly offers us simple pleasures to love....opening ourselves to the beauty around us is a way to bring more happiness and peace in our lives...helps us thrill to the excitement of our universe....Our natural world is alive with beauty and wonder. There's space, calm and solitude, portal to appreciation. Its stillness is an underrated sensation. Yet, when all is calm and quiet, we exhale with a sigh, perhaps closing our eyes for a moment, then, looking about, see beauty. Its sort of like a massage, stillness in the way it bestows relaxation to spots you didn't even know were tense. Experience nature at its undisturbed finest!

This was just a random thought and like Albert Einstein said "Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better"

Strike a Balance!

Couple of years ago I attended a workshop titled "Adventures in Attitude" conducted by Carlson Learning Group who are associated with TGIF ( Thank God Its Friday) ..while going through the workshop we came across an interesting topic..."Balance of Life".....which states that its very important to strike a balance in all the facets of life( work, health, personal, social, & recreation) or in other words live a balanced life......today I realize it even more that Balance and its Power is indeed a key element of a Happy Life....life minus balance is equivalent to inviting stress in our lives...quite frankly time is not the problem but the number of task that we take on....we need to learn to juggle between all the areas of life....basically arrange for a scaling back down the road. Even if we're in a very hard-hitting, high powered position, that doesn't mean we sacrifice our family. If we take self care measures and get creative about integrating between our work and family we can be successful and fulfill personal obligations...thereof imperative to re-assess our happiness and satisfaction with the level of housework, time spent together and what amount of time we each spend at work and home.

When I say creative I don't mean inventing something totally new, it is about making new synergistic connections. Give yourself permission to be playful and inquisitive, flexible and versatile and finding the right balance in our body, mind, life and work will help us refine our goals and hasten us towards them. It will lead on to a journey to improved health, spirit and well-being. Like Dalai Lama teaches, "A balanced and skillful approach to life taking care to avoid extremes, becomes a very important factor in conducting one's everyday existence. It is important in all aspects of life.".....therefore will assist us in bringing down the level of heightened state of mind. On the tightrope of life, only one thing allows us to move forward, and that one thing is balance. Without balance we fall into chaos, we fall behind, we miss out on what true choices we have in life. Like Brian Tracy quoted "The universe is completely balanced and in perfect order. You will always be compensated for everything that you do".

On that note let us all begin living our best lives-not some one-size- fits- all, contrived happiness!

Young & the Restless!

Death doesn't lie!

It was only yesterday that I was thinking as to what should be my next blog about..thought why not write about Life and how uncertain it is these days as you don't know what's going to happen tomorrow....and when we say this we imagine that hour as placed in an obscure and distant future...one reaction to this discomfort is to communicate to gain information and reduce uncertainty....

In an age of blockbuster disaster movies, sometimes real tragedy seems unreal....No one wants to die yet death is the destination we all share. No one has escaped it either...it slices through every lie, ridicules every belief, mocks every vanity and reduces ego to absurdity....

Sorry for being so dramatic ....but this article is a Tribute to a friend ( Supratik) who passed away on 23rd April,2008 in a tragic event... "Strange, isn't it ? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?" as quoted by Henry Travers

Spend Talent Lavishly!

" A Good lot of talent is lost in this world but for one a little encouragement" ...sounds familiar..isn't it? Yup you'll find this one liner in my Profile ( about me).....just a thought that there are numerous people out there who possess various kinds of hidden talent in them but for some reason or the other not able to exhibit them, therefore not cultivate the seed....reasons could be time, money, right opportunity, fear of what other's might say or comment and many more.....and it is these reasons and more which stops an individual to show one's own potential....the population is few who has the "courage to nurture their talent in solitude and follow to the dark place where it leads" but for many if one can motivate us to determine what we can do then that is enough for us to understand our ability and what we're capable of doing.....and the right attitude should determine how well we can do it....belief that they will accomplish them.....hence work your tail off to develop them into skills....more so inner drive and avid faith will help go so much further than vastly superior talented ones.. Like Eric Butterworth quoted "Why be an average person? All the great achievements of history have been made by strong individuals who refused to consult statistics or to listen to those who could prove convincingly that what they wanted to do , and in fact ultimately did do, was completely impossible"

"The task is to recognize that we are uniquely special, have something to give, some talent no one shares in quite the same way"....a theater that moves an audience,eventually blossoms and enjoy the benefit of it and acknowledge one for it....reminds me Stephen Covey's quote from The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness...."When you engage in a work that taps your talent and fuels your passion --that rises out of a great need in the world that you feel drawn by conscience to meet -- therein lies your voice, your calling, your soul's code"

Therefore "If you have a talent, use it in ever which way possible. Don't hoard it. Don't dole it out like a miser. Spend it lavishly, like a millionaire intent on going broke" by Brenda Francis.

Happy Earth Day!

Spectacular Image-detailed true color picture of the Earth.

Time-Brisk Wind!

Same time last year I was struggling with my big belly, swollen foot, heart burns, etc. ....Reason: in a family way with the second one!....very close to anticipating her birth as "a fresh twist to a knot".....Longing for the day when I could physically carry the baby in my arms...another adventure about to begin...more than that thinking when I could finally be over and done with and lose all those weight.....today I feel like I'm a free bird...lost all those weight, over and done with two kids, all I need to concentrate now on-is to raise them well, provide them the right values and education, shape them up as a better individual....

Thanks to the Government and their great system of giving one year maternity leave to all pregnant mom's. I have thoroughly enjoyed this one year ( still have 3 months to go back to work)...My real comfort of staying at home lies in-when I see my kids are taken care of- well fed, had their share of afternoon naps, took them out for activities, studies are taken care of ....overall the entire house is taken care of....and some time to myself...Again this is not a debate between working mothers and stay-at home mom's but a thought that this has been one of the greatest year so far....didn't leave a single stone unturned....each moment had its sickle-emulous.....like Ann Richards quoted "There is a lot more to life than just struggling to make money"

"Time flies on restless pinions"...didn't even come to know how one year of mat leave is almost coming to an end...passed in a blur...and "sometimes every second was significant etched in my mind".... Reminds me of a J.K Rowling quote which goes like this... "It's a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up"......the little one is now almost nine months old...she's handful of sand now, the tighter you grasp the faster she runs through my fingers...and the elder one soon going to Grade One..Wow! ...and it is this time that will remind me of all the cherished moments, will remind me of how I have lived it .....this one year have helped me to understand better than before, how infinitely rich and beautiful life is in every way...."every minute spent is an hour earned"!

Summer's Pride!

Yard Sale
Farmer's Market
Quilted Heirlooms, Saint Jacobs Farmer's Market

For all those who wants an update as to how's Risha doing? She's doing GREAT! we definitely see some improvement in her hand movement and physiotherapy is still on plus exercises at home...

Finally spring has arrived with double digit temperatures, weather is gorgeous and in no time hot sizzling summer will arrive too. There's no ignoring summertime. Fun time is here again (coming soon actually!) as kids dash out in bikinis, holding bucket and spade in hands, lapping on loads of sunblock lotion and running off in flipflop in a carefree manner, love sun drenched days, garden fragrances thick in the air, the dandelions and buttercups gild all the lawn and starlit nights. After being trapped indoor for good 7 months, now its time to break free and bask in the warm sunshine! There's burst of activities lined up. And naturally there'll be barbecue invitations too. And when I say burst of activities, one of them that's lined up for me is "GARAGE SALE", also called "Rummage Sale", "Attic Sale"....I'm a complete "Garage Sale Savvy" come weekends and I love to explore from one street to the other looking for mostly decorative items, an excellent way of spring cleaning for many, to get rid of old stuff and start afresh, and for many like me these items becomes treasure....usually I'm an "Early Bird" in Garage Sale meaning arrive before the hours of sale to review the items....after all who wouldn't love the summer morning so bright and fresh, birds darting to breast the breeze and sweeps the cool clear sky!

The second and the last burst of activities that I'm crazy about is "Farmer's Market"-a benefit for the urban consumer who values quality, variety and freshness in food. I usually visit one that's close to my house but this time guaranteed I'm going to Saint Jacobs-heard Farmer's Market here is fabulous every season. Aisles and aisles of fresh produce from across Ontario and from local farm gardens. More than 600 vendors in a colorful rural settings. Plus crafts, home decor, clothes, tools and many more. The other incentive that draws me to visit this place is the "On-site petting barn" that I wanted to show my elder one for the longest time. I definitely want to discover this Saint Jacobs country, have a gentler time, explore one of Canada's largest year-round farmer's market.

Summer is definitely a strong and commanding season, where it leaves many traces of its presence. Enjoy the sunshine while it lasts!

Friends-Free enterprise!

What a wretched lot of old shrivelled creatures we were yesterday..uglier to others but lovelier to each other...and can afford to be stupid too....redoubled our joys, completely rejuvenated, a good BREAK...by that here I mean "friends" and friendship and how important it becomes to have a good bunch of them, engage in inconsequential chatter, to be able to just be yourself with them, be unreservedly frank, almost a real value to survival....Road to realization-that now a close knit family!....even though we've changed and finding our own place in the world but no matter what we still carry the feeling of oneness....

Four years ago the discovery started as to who all "would grow separately without growing apart", with time we found or rather discovered a reasonable circle of friends...."don't remember how we happened to meet each other, don't remember who got along with whom first , all I remember is all of us together...always" .....absolutely down-to-earth people, no hang ups in life, very informal, gives us a feeling of being our own...therefore no formalities whatsoever and that's what I appreciated!....being in this part of the world minus family is like a huge vacuum....hence we needed those special few who would be able to leave a footprints in our hearts....Its a fact that "Friends are God's way of apologizing to us for families"...and mind you they were all strangers in the first place....but now they do form an important part of our life....today I/we realize this even more....

We are all born alone, live alone, die alone yet we needed these strong and habitual inclination of friendship ( the most quoted subject in the history of mankind)....its a taste of truth which spares nothing...Hence "Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom" by Marcel Proust.

And as Barbara Ehrenreich's quotes " That's free enterprise , friends: freedom to gamble, freedom to lose. And the greatest thing -- the truly democratic thing about it -- is that don't even have to be a player to lose".....strikes a chord in me!

Unforgettable!

"Unforgettable, that's what you are".... Yup I'm talking about "first love which is something so special to all of us" .....unforgettable for some or rather most of us, as it leaves such a life-long impact on us..."One could fall in love many times during the course of a lifetime, but the first rush of love always holds a special place in our hearts. The novelty, like the first drops of dew on an untouched leaf, of the feeling makes it special and unforgettable". It touches our lives and enriches them forever, sometimes idealise them."First Love" is a heady mix of passion and attraction, feeling unknown, unhoped for, unexpected...a company that's electrified and enkindled....for many makes the world go round! Its a different feeling altogether when he called you beautiful instead of hot, called you back when you hung up on him, or did hold your hands in front of his friends and turned to them and said "that's her"!

The magic is such that it can never end...For some it may have been easy to begin but must have been hard to end....For many it may have been a brief moment of vanity or infatuation or remember it as innocent and fragile, when you look back in a situation...and for those whose "First Love" didn't last throughout all time, because there is a reason and there is a meaning, somewhere in the corner of their heart the string remained .....the values never diminishes and we are only left with memories that never fades but will treasure for the rest of our lives...

Either ways the first blush of love is always filled to overflowing but guess has its time, its own season, its own reason for coming and going!

Straight from the Heart!

With each visit in Sick Kids Foundation,looking at the bumble bees, these children and their smiling faces, happy and absorbed...it touches me... I actually prefer to call them "superheroes" who inspite of frightening surgeries and painful procedures continue to make the most of their childhood...gives me a psychological trauma....Gives me a feeling as if I'm carrying an atmosphere of quiet contemplation....I cannot physically experience these kids but can experience them in my mind....and these sites shackles me and I say to myself "no more walls"...This is an overly sensitive heart speaking!....

Looking at each one of them was equivalent to looking at pictures telling its own story, shaped by the mood or insights of the person....almost lost myself in the object of their wonder....my emotions here is very close to the surface....as rightly quoted by Sophocles that "Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life".....

True that "The joys of parents are secret, and so are their griefs and fears: they cannot utter the one, nor will they utter the other" as quoted by Francis Bacon Sr.

Sister-an Unbreakable Bond!

Still remember the day she was born…she was quiet big, already looked like a 6 month old baby…almost tucked her so close that there was no chance of escape....and when she used to sleep while my mom thought quickly she could finish all her household chores, there comes me to wake her up….even though she never understood and clueless of what I said, still attempted to teach her alphabets and numbers….on weekends would carry her in my arms and hang around at neighbors house or take her to play in the park understanding that mum could finish some of her errands....helping my mom to feed her was like a “tug of war”.....

When she started going to school the moment I would drop her in her classroom she would innocently look at me and keep looking as far as she could …..telling me “never leave me and abandon me”…..and the moment school was over she used to look for me in the school bus and would be so relieved to see me…..Like Pam Brown quoted “A young sister is someone to use as a guinea pig in trying sledges and experimental go carts. Someone to send on messages to Mum. But someone who needs you-who comes to you with bumped heads, grazed knees, tales of persecution. Someone who trust you to defend her. Someone who thinks you know the answers to almost everything” …..quiet true…and as she grew up….we fought like cats and dogs….we patched up too..said some of the meanest things to each other…did some of the silliest things together…and there’s so many stories to be recalled when we were together…….she didn’t come to see me off when I was leaving for another city for my high-school…reason: she couldn’t take the fact that I was leaving….I missed her everyday then ….Felt her volatile love for me when she was in “crocodile tears” when I got married and was leaving ….never knew it’s this little sis of mine who would function as “safety nets in a chaotic world”….defending me in all corners… time flies and she’s a big girl now….It doesn’t seem to matter now how much time has elapsed or how far we’ve traveled….all that matters now is that we are cast in relation our whole lives long….she knows my faults, virtues, catastrophes, triumphs, rivalries, desires and many more….with time the bonding of sisterhood have become even more powerful…..

Now that she plans to visit us almost after 4 ½ years…I cant wait to see her before she heads off for her big career plunge...already started making plans like she’s arriving tomorrow….The feeling is so intensified!

On that note here’s something for you that I may have not told you in years “It was nice growing up with someone like you-someone to lean on, someone to count on…someone to tell on!” Author Unknown

Earth Hour!

The logo for Earth Hour
Overview of Sydney in Earth Hour 2008

Last year an idea was sparked by lights being turned off for an hour in Australia's lead city- Sydney, today Earth Hour is an International Event which asks household and businesses to turn off their lights and shut down non-essential appliances on the evening of March 29th between the hours of 8-9 pm to promote electricity conservation thus reducing carbon emissions. Hopes of a cleaner world to shine in our darkest hour. Communities and individuals are getting together to find new ways to reduce their impact on their environment and to start a movement that ends with a solution to the common challenge we all face. Millions of Americans and around the globe, people on five continents took part, from Albania to Zimbabwe, Bosnia to Uzbekistan, Canada to Uruguay to spread awareness and make it a highly successful event.

Earth Hour now being a huge global success therefore sends a strong message that we need to take action on climate change now. There were Celebrations around the world to mark the end of Earth Hour. Sydney celebrated with fireworks while Nelly Furtado held a concert at Nathan Philips Square in downtown Toronto to celebrate Earth Hour.

Hence the message that even the longest journey begins with a single step!

A Twist of Fate!

How cruel is that of an individual to make use of somebody's love, money, emotions,energy and probably many more to land onto a foreign land, when he anxiously waits for her in the airport after six long months of paperwork to start a new beginning in his life...and then she says upon arrival that "I don't love you, I love somebody else, give me all that requires to set me free"...By that I mean divorce...Those were his moments of truth...His fate took a weird twist...You live with him in his own house which was bought to provide all comfort and luxuries, does expenses to keep his loved one happy and and he gets nothing in return...while he puts his heart and soul, makes extra effort, 100% positive that the marriage will work , believing "let bygones be bygones"....she continues to do her homework as to how to rip him off through his wallet ( one's own hard earned money) , thinking how to amputate him...ask what's his fault, prompt comes the response "Because he tries to make this relationship work"....

There you go somebody wants to go Scott free and upgrade her status at the expense of somebody else's money yet talks about her own entitlement. What kind of conscience is that? Dirt Cheap I would say....For him "It was First Love", she meant the world to him, dreamt many dreams, planned probably five years ahead....I can imagine the "monumental assault on his heart".....and the hatred planted within him will never fade...Reminds me of a song of Michael Learns to Rock titled "Breaking my heart" which goes "There is no excuse my friend for breaking my heart, breaking my heart again, this is where our journey ends for breaking my heart again"! True some journeys cant be traveled together so it stops there....

It hurts me specially when its not meant for a deep loyal soul....I know it will take years for you to amend but I'm always there when the whole world has gone out ! After all "A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are"

Cheers!

Picture Perfect!

Here's some more pics of Risha ( on demand)....hope you enjoy!

A World of Colours!

Just wondering how colors dominate our lives...whether its the colors of the season, reading signs on road, decor of our homes and its background ( which speaks volumes of one's individual tastes and preferences) or seeing if fruit is ripe to eat. We use and experience color everyday without us noticing much about it.

According to the Kueppers theory, color is merely a "color sensation". In the same way we feel the prick of a needle on our skin, we sense color through an irritation of the retina. This is only one cornerstone of the theory, but it instantly opens the door to the notion that feelings are linked to the perception of colors. Depending on our nature and background, we understand better why certain tones bother us while others delight us. Awakening the emotions-cold tones calm us, warm ones excite us, and a zillion colors between these extremes can bring balance.

I think colors have immense power, not only to stimulate the human mind but also affect human emotions. According to psychologist colors have an impact on our mood, the colors we choose speak a lot about the way we feel. For example when we think of "Red" we associate "Love" with it or "Yellow for Friendship", "White for Peace" and so on. Color soothes the eye, it makes things more distinct for the eye to observe.

Thanks to evolving trends, each year we rediscover shades that awaken in us forgotten emotions. Provides coherence between the things that adorn our world.

Pablo Picasso is right when he quoted "Colors like features, follow the changes of the emotions"

Peaceful, Easy Feeling!

March 24th..Risha's pink cast has been removed....seeing her hand straight and meeting the Physiotherapist gave me a feeling of calm ....though her arm is soar right now and for obvious reason( the cast which hugged her tight for the last three weeks)....the process goes on..doesn't stop here....physiotherapy, reviews and probably more....still keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that this should be it....

The collapsed feeling under my skin has made me strong now....and the latent force within me made me hop off the straight and narrow...all these came from an indomitable will I guess..A month ago it was painful and now its an experience....That's life I suppose when we come across challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions and with each step we take we become more skilled, confident and successful...

Yet Peaceful, easy feeling is what I'm going through!....

Its Easter Day!

Happy Easter Day!

From what I've learned in my history classes back in the days that on this day Christians celebrate the resurrection of Jesus Christ. Christians believe according to scriptures, that Jesus Christ came back to life after three days of his death on the cross. The death of Jesus Christ by crucifixion is commemorated on Good Friday, always the Friday just before Easter. Through his death, burial and resurrection, Jesus paid the penalty for sin.

On that note let us all share the warm and wonderful spirit of Spring and Easter with this beautiful poem "May the love of Jesus Christ, our Saviour, surround you, protect you and guide you in everything you do on this holy day and always"!

"Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world" ( KJV) John 1:29

Happy Holi!

Holi GreetingsHoli Colours
Holi Fun

Today is the colorful festival of Holi, where people apply colors on each other...children will already have special plans for this day...This festival welcomes the spring and throw off the gloom of winter....In my homeland the play is all over but here it just started...Good time for friends and family to get together and have a good time...and this gives people a good reason to rejoice, make merry and submerge themselves into the spirit of Holi!.....exchange of gifts, sweets and greetings also takes place...

This festival has its ancient origin and celebrates the triumph of "good over bad". Numerous legends and stories are associated with Holi Celebration which makes the festival even more exuberant and vivid. Not to forget that I have several memories too attached with this festival and they are all coming back to me now....Still remember how I used to be drenched in colors and my dad not recognizing me, thinking me to be an outsider and telling me to leave the premises....Funny ha!

On that note folks I conclude "Happy Holi", Happy Weekend and "Happy Easter"!

Fresh Outlook!

March 20th was the first day of spring yet no signs of relief. Still has to be layered..though the sun is shinning and warms and lights us on a regular basis but unknown what its signaling to....Heard one more snow storm to go....This is what happens to me...come March third week and I get impatient about summers...here I am sitting anxiously, waiting to welcome summer but doesn't seem to come any sooner...Cant go against Nature I guess! But still would say "May the sun shine all day long"!

In this part of the world people are blessed with a fine appreciation for warm weather. After all, we wait so long for it to arrive. And when it does we tend to make the most of it and this season I intend to come up with some fresh decorating ideas to help bring my lawn-both front and back to life this spring, summer and beyond..Ideas all set in my mind and mere thought of it makes me fall in love with my backyard once again ....Truly nature can help you bridge the seemingly contradictory aims of creating an attractively grown-up yet kid friendly outdoor space. I'm planning to decorate my backyard in such a way so it demarcates zones for kids and adults so everyone has room to unwind in. Still don't know as to what I'm going to do with the space that I have near where my Air Conditioner is placed...probably plant some vegetations or nice marigold flowers in bunches and maintaining gaps between each bunches and surround this with brick boundaries....Overall a neat look yet should look beautiful, easy to maintain...

For my front outdoor space "Planters would be a perfect ten"...as they provide the crowning touch to your outdoor space...specially the ones with rustic Terra cotta or classic cast iron look along with best selection of seasonal plants and flowers are a perfect blend.

Besides this I'm going to light the way with solar powered path-lights which would add style and function without costing the planet. This time my eye is set on Malibu solar light with frosted shade in Satin Bronze.

I guess that's all for this season...Too many plans ..hope it results to be a treat that we all can relish...After all "Its designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything is new again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings and then as soon as the chill rains comes, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone" as A Bartlett Giamatti quotes!

Counting Days!

Four more days left and my daughter's cast will be removed and we would know the results... though I'm pretty confident that with physiotherapy the movement of her hand will be much better...after all the surgery was not to worsen the case but to improve it....( for many of you may not notice anything at all with her left hand but there's a slight twist in her left arm for which she was operated)....for an outsider not noticing her hands at all and before surgery was all "natural recovery" and she compensated well....she has enough strength in her hand overall....

After she was discharged from the hospital I didn't know what to do if she complained of pain or how she will manage with the cast for 3 weeks...My heart used to beat fast all the time because I had no means to pacify her..Felt helpless..and this Spica cast is different...its like a wrap-a-round around her chest and another cast on her left arm and these two has been supported with a wood and her hand has been kept straight for the last 3 weeks...the five centimeter incission has been done just below the shoulder at the back....Difficult! Still find it hard to digest.

But I'm glad God gave me the courage and strength to face it all and I'm finally here. Thank you all for your prayers and wishes. Believe me it was tough!

And that reminds me of a Swedish Proverb " Fear less, hope more. Eat less, chew more. Whine less, breathe more. Talk less, say more. Hate less, love more..And all good things are yours"!

Stratford and its People!

Ontario Street in Stratford during Summertime!

Statue of William Shakespeare

Shakespeare Theater (view from outside)

Stratford's City Hall

Swan-symbol of Stratford


Gardens
Galleries

Hi Guys I'm finally into blogging again....weekend being gorgeous, bright and sunny, was tempted enough to be outdoor.

Just an update for all those who wants to know as to how's Risha doing..she doing Great! She's brave like I always say and I'm not bragging at all and she took it all with a SMILE!

So back to what I was saying ...On Tuesday i.e March 11th my favorite uncle and aunt visited us. My last blog does mention of this place Stratford, yes they are the ones who belong to this place and we make it a point to visit them on most long weekends...makes us relax and away from daily routine....to top it all who wouldn't love to chit chat with such amazing couple who make you feel at home...Though the world is a mixture of good and bad but its a rare sight to see such wonderful people ( my uncle and aunt ). Someone with whom you can be yourself and don't have to put on a plastic smile. Finding people in your own relations is kinda difficult..having age gap of good 35 years yet they make me at ease instantly...the moment we meet them we immediately get connected....they are someone who has no hang ups in life....no formalities whatsoever...complete straightforward people....I think next to my best friend if I could discuss something it would be them....conversations could go on ....they are full of qualities...My hats off to them for being who they are and how they are! ...and where they are ...the place they belong to... beautifies them even more....lush green landscapes, Shakespearean gardens, heritage buildings, downtown and the eating joints with patio beautifully decorated with impatience flowers all these and many more make it even more enchanting....Gives me calmness of mind, evenness of temper, undisturbed state, coolness and composure....

Stratford is a city located on Avon River in Southwestern Ontario. Its small town image is indeed worth seeing. Swan is the symbol of the city. From what I've heard is that the city was named after Stratford of England, Shakespearean fame...Mainly retired people reside in this city...not that young couples don't live here....to add to it the quality of life is better compared to big cities....Considered to be one of the most beautiful cities in Canada...a must see Gateway...Stratford has the magic to make it memorable....

On that note folks "Prepare to be enchanted"!

Thinkpad: I'm over and done with two...no more angels...
Yes ..you got it...I combined Risha and Sanaya to make it "Rinaya"

Blessed!

Didn't really hibernate but as an Aquarian sometimes do hide the considerable depths of one's character under a cloak frivolity. Jokes apart! today I really feel blessed for having "Sanaya" ( my little one) in my life. As Mark Twain quoted "A baby is inestimable blessing and bother". Truly ever since she was born she's always been quite and no trouble at all. If she cried at all then it was an indication that she wanted to be fed or diaper needs to be changed. Still remember when she was only seven days old we took her to African Lion Safari and she was not troubled at all...just diaper change, nurse her and she was good to go...Many of you might say that this is the time when babies sleeps most of the time so its nothing unusual ....but believe me like "every pregnancy is different, same way every babies are different". Even though her sleeping pattern changed after a month yet she wouldn't trouble me and I could leave her in the crib and do my work...I can only think of one night when she cried of stomach pain ( colic) and that's it....she began to enjoy the company of her elder sister and so was the elder one....We traveled to Stratford which is 120 kms from my place, takes exactly one and a half hours of travel time yet no signs of discomfort.....We spend hours in Malls and she's very comfortable....Even on the day of my elder daughter's surgery we left early and spent the whole day there and she was very co-operative, no cry absolutely and I had no choice anyways where I could keep her....to add to it when my husband was traveling back home...I was worried thinking "if she cries on highway" but heard she slept while traveling back and while coming back to the hospital next day.....couldn't have asked for more....As rightly quoted by an unknown author "When they placed you in my arm, you slipped into my heart" Truly Sanaya!

On that note I want to Thank God and Thanks mom for helping me in my most difficult times!

Hi! All

Cathy: Nice to know that you grew up in Montreal and yeah it is indeed a nice travel destination, though I have been there for a day and a half but would like to explore the city in length..The night life there is awesome..the other one that is incomplete is Quebec....the French Connection and all that....

Erica: My email is updated...so we're good to go now!

Thinkpad: I'm okay with you providing link to my blog! Keep commenting.

Rina: Sure I will visit the places you mentioned...not to forget Dilli Haat's fruit beer and momos...yummy yummy in my tummy!

Now and Then

Wow! finally managed to get some time to work on my blogs....guess too much work...but at the same time love the idea of multi-tasking...keeps me busy!.....

Just wondering how life takes a turn when you are having an affair and when you get married and have kids....A drastic change takes place...Back in 1997 when I met my husband ( now) then my boyfriend it used to be only us...just me and him and nothing in between....He used to be my center of attraction and I used to be him...We were focal point for each other...Meeting him thrice a week was compulsory but we both used to wait eagerly for weekends.....come weekend and we used to be out for the whole day....watching movie, eating out, shopping, just hanging around in Priya ( Delhites.... are quite familiar with this place) used to be our favorite pastime. What a feeling! Its the best thing that one could ever experience...falling in love and in love with the person you always wanted...and if its love at first sight...half of your job is done....and that's what happened to me...Yes! it was Love at First sight....Felt like we knew each other for the longest time just like a sailor would know the open sea....We were growing together...We were mad about each other...didn't care about the world....we became rebels at that time and nothing could stop us.....at that time it was like "Take away love and our earth is tomb" as rightly quoted by Robert Browning.....

But sooner or later we had to enter into the institution of marriage and we did but since then life has never been the same....all those pampering and nurturing were all gone....lost all freedom....Family mattered most, I mean in-laws, relations etc. That's why in our religion people say that when a girl gets married she just not gets married to the boy but to the whole family. At one point I almost felt like me and my husband were stretched enough to make spaces for all these third parties to fit in....But I am glad we made the right move at that time according to situations....And after having kids one becomes all the more busy....taking care of them, raising them, thinking about their betterment,one tends to think about their kid's future, education, career plans and all these then takes the front seat.....all these and many more and then we fail to strike a balance between all the areas of life....

Huge difference between now and then! Its a Paradigm Shift....Yet to conclude I would say "Love is all we have, the only way that each can help the other" by Euripides